How...

Drivng to the farm Monday night I had the sudden belief I was pregnant. I would have been JUST pregnant... it was only a few days from the last time NGB and I got all adult friendly. And that was the first time in awhile. 

The idea was so clear in my head I almost announced it to my parents that desperately want grandchildren. I believe it is a wondeful case of PMS-hormone induced insanity... but does anyone ever just know? 

Update on a smile

Today I was walking to another meeting and I say "spare a smile" guy, from here. He still had the same sign, but he looked so much happier. There was not the same bleakness in his eyes. 

I think the smiles he gets from random strangers is starting to fill the part of him that was empty...

Exercising like a woman

Last night I convicned NGB to do the 30-day shred video with me. He has watched me do it twice now (over two weeks, yes, but I'll get better) and I am not sure he fully appreciated the pain of Ms. Jillian. 

He has some challenges initially. Poor guy is freakishly tall at 6'5" so jumping jacks and lifting his arms overhead in a low ceiling basement is not possible. But he did what he could and modified some exercises. 

About half way through he dropped his arms to his sides, stopped jumping and with a look of exasperation and pain asked:

"When did you stop loving me? Why would you make me DO THIS VIDEO??"

Exercise like a girl, baby... it burns real nice *grin*

Comparing and I lost...

Last night NGB and I were comparing stomach rolls. Not sexy, but we were both complaining about our weight and showing off our excess. We decided to bring numbers into it. I told him my number. With shock and incredulity in his voice he said...

"Wow! You don't look that heavy"

*sigh*

Well, at least I don't LOOK it. But I am it... time to lose this extra. 

And, no one was harmed after statements that could be seen to be insulting. Or offensive. Or downright MEAN. Yet. 

How a video game taught me something

Last night I was officially made an officer in my guild in a silly video game that I play way too much. And I am SO PROUD. I want to celebrate! And there is no one to celebrate with. My coworkers do not understand. My "normal" friends do not understand. The geeks I know (that don't play) do not understand. My friends in game, many of them used to be officers so I don't want to go there. NGB is going through some stuff that is way more important than a video game... 

This, I think, is part of the learning I need. Restraint. I go through life like big slobbery puppy. Having to do this, to be proud of me quietly and inside, is important. Something I have always respected in others and now I can emulate in myself. 

But maybe, just maybe, I'll have a quiet glass of wine with me tonight to celebrate. 

My love seems shallow in comparison

I love lists. I love making lists, crossing things off lists, adding things to lists so that I can cross them off... I LOVE lists.  But my love is shallow compared to this website.

Check out the sample lists. A list of questions to ask at family dinner, and a place to record the answers. A list to make shopping at Target easier. Lists of family meals, with preferences... There is a list for EVERYTHING here.

I think I need to go make a list of reasons I adore lists, just to prove to myself that my love is real...